Yeah I'm pretty sure this is the second update, anyway, what's new with my resolutions eh? Let's think for a moment...
Eating Healthy - Haven't really been making an effort to, so no positives to be seen here, on the plus side I haven't been eating any worse than usual lol.
Excersize - Complete fail, indeed not long ago, I had a period where I didn't even see sunlight for 12 days ;D but my sunlight avoidance is over (was sort of a depressive state or something, I still can't figure out what was goin on).
Girls - Fail as usual, but it's not any worse again which is good lol.
Sleeping pattern - There are signs of improvement but then I just have 1 fail and I'm back to square 1. I had a few days in a row of getting to sleep at good hours and then BAM, 1 night where I slip up and go to bed at 2-3 am and I'm back to where I started, frustratingly trying to gradually change my body-clock back to a reasonable hour. However, tonight it's only 11:40pm as I type this so once I type this I'm getting off and seeing how I go considering last night I got 4 hours of sleep, falling asleep at this point should be no problem right?
In the words of my friend, 'Mileage may vary.' ;D
What else...
Instruments - I downloaded a bunch of trial versions of programs that are used to make songs that sound very much like they're out of retro video-games so I'll be giving those a whirl at some point. Other than that, no progress because I have no money to buy a Saxophone because I don't have a job.
Which brings me to my next point.
Breaking into the 3D industry - now this I've been trying to do more than the rest but I've been knocked back by quite a few companies now so no luck so far. I did meet with a bunch of Indie game developers where I live though which was cool as I got to learn about the industry, share a drink, hear some stories etc. I'm now doing some pre-alpha testing of a video-game for one of those guys and having some fun with it so maybe I could put that on my resume if I'm successful enough? It's not an epic huge blockbuster title but it still gives me the opportunity to do some QA testing which I've never done before.
While I'm working on getting into the 3D industry, I've started applying for part time jobs in retail. I quit my job at McDonald's about a month and a bit ago so I have had no money because of that but it wasn't worth it at McDonald's anyway. I'm currently trying to get a job in video game retail because I actually have the knowledge about video games to do it and I figure it could be more fun. Hopefully I start hearing the word Interview from a few phone calls soon, fingers crossed.
Car/Motorbike License - No progress to report at all. I will get onto this soon, It's just not at the top of my priority list right now.
Move out - Nope
I think that covers all that I had written down for my NYE resolutions. Something I'm adding to that not as a resolution but as a goal of mine, is to be practicing 3D for at least 1 hour per day, so that I can keep my skills sharp. Lately I've had multiple days where I don't even open up the 3D package so it is paramount that I do this to avoid simply losing myself to procrastination. I'm also gonna learn Python scripting language (I think the latest 2.# version, since the 3.# versions are test ones, I think, not sure, will check later).
So I haven't had much progress :S
BUT
My friend and his cousin have made a pact to do a few things by a certain amount of years time, akin to my resolutions but over many years instead of just 1. I talked to my friend and we figure that it'll be easier to keep on track with our goals and motivated if we help each other out as much as possible. He wants a number of the same goals as me, eg, eating healthy, being fit, improving financial situation etc, and then a few of his own, involving racing go-karts/Formula Fords and other things. So I believe we can help each other out, though the main motivation has to come from within, and I know that I truly want to improve myself by doing the above things.
After all, as courage wolf says, "Better to die of thirst, than drink from the cup of mediocrity." (Yes I love courage wolf, makes me feel good just reading them :D).
Monday, April 19, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
"Mate, there are 2 things in life that will give you grief, cars and...
...Women." That's what my step-dad once told me a year or two ago, and he's sort of on the right track too. This post I want to talk about women in a bit more depth, but not on some sort of "lol look at me I know and understand everything about women perfectly" rant, but to sort of analyze my preferences and how far detached they seem to be from the majority of society.
You see, most of society will probably think that I'm some kind of fucked up wierdo for this but I do not find supermodels attractive at all. Even the ones that aren't stick thin and actually look healthy do not do anything for me at all. Something about the "perfection" that they supposedly have in their physicality is actually quite the turn-off for me.
The most prominent example of this is that I not only find Megan Fox UN-ATTRACTIVE, but REPULSIVE! I remember telling a friend of mine this who thinks she is incredibly hawt and his reaction was hilarious. One of the things he said to me was "So you're saying if she was here and you had the option to have sex with her you wouldn't?" "Nope." He called bullshit on me but what I said is no bullshit, no sir. I just do not find that sort of girl attractive at all.
Those "super-hot" blonde cheerleader type girls? No thanks. The crazy "hot" girls dancing around at clubs and generally being quite promiscuous? No thanks. Hell, the porn stars with massive (obviously fake) boobs and all that? No thanks.
I seem to go for the odd looking girls, the "imperfect" ones so to speak. Don't get me wrong though, I still have to be attracted to them, which means I don't go for chubby girls for one (which have had a track record of being attracted to ME over the years for some reason :S), but narrowing down what I find attractive and un-attractive is no easy task, because things that I seem to find un-attractive on one girl can be attractive on another. Such is the complexity of human attraction and I'm absolutely sure I'm not the only one with this problem, It's just that I know for sure that the "super hot" type are a no go for me.
To give you an example, I was at a diner the other day with the family and there were several female waitresses, all probably around the early to mid twenties age range. The ones I remember the best were this typical "blonde hottie" and this girl with puppy fat around her chin and a sweet hair cut with this well placed blond streak thingo happening around the front. Yeah you can probably see where I'm going with this. I was definitely perving on her, she just looked incredibly cute, whereas I know my friends would've been perving on the blonde if they had have been there.
I know that for me, a girls attractiveness earns bonus points if she wears reading glasses but thats just a weird thing I have. I like girls that do interesting things with their hair (if you wanna see some examples, Google "Scene girls" though I do not necessarily find them attractive, just that their hair is typically awesome). I like girls who wear stuff that isn't the top notch high trend fashion junk (no offense to anyone that is into that, I just don't like it, also jeans are win at all times).
And it's also important to remember that attractiveness is not just about looks but personality too. I think most people forget about this when they look at people they think are hot and just focus on the looks without observing them and trying to see how they are. You can't really make a very accurate assessment though based on just looking on from a distance which is where the trial and error of dating really starts to play its part as you really need to hang out with said person if you want to get to know them.
As far as personality goes for me though, I like girls who don't think or do things because the media tells them to, or because they follow society's ideas instead of thinking critically about something and deciding for themselves what they think or feel about issues/ideas. I like girls who are NOT loud all the time, and girls who don't just want the guy to do everything. Relationships are a two way street after all. Girls who are just "weird" or different in one way or another seem to get noticed by me more than those who are just "normal" (normal and weird being completely subjective to personal opinion of course, for the purpose of this imagine it as society's idea of "normal" and "weird").
I'm not sure what else to add to this, as it seems to be a pretty good summary already. I guess the only thing that is left for me is to conquer my cowardice about approaching women and to just give it a shot. I'm fairly terrified of doing that though, despite all the self-help/alpha-male bullshit I've read through and even tried. I probably need counselling for this or something lol. Just know, quiet/nerdy/weird/not-supermodel-looking girls, that there are people that do find you attractive, they're probably all just shy like me T_T .
You see, most of society will probably think that I'm some kind of fucked up wierdo for this but I do not find supermodels attractive at all. Even the ones that aren't stick thin and actually look healthy do not do anything for me at all. Something about the "perfection" that they supposedly have in their physicality is actually quite the turn-off for me.
The most prominent example of this is that I not only find Megan Fox UN-ATTRACTIVE, but REPULSIVE! I remember telling a friend of mine this who thinks she is incredibly hawt and his reaction was hilarious. One of the things he said to me was "So you're saying if she was here and you had the option to have sex with her you wouldn't?" "Nope." He called bullshit on me but what I said is no bullshit, no sir. I just do not find that sort of girl attractive at all.
Those "super-hot" blonde cheerleader type girls? No thanks. The crazy "hot" girls dancing around at clubs and generally being quite promiscuous? No thanks. Hell, the porn stars with massive (obviously fake) boobs and all that? No thanks.
I seem to go for the odd looking girls, the "imperfect" ones so to speak. Don't get me wrong though, I still have to be attracted to them, which means I don't go for chubby girls for one (which have had a track record of being attracted to ME over the years for some reason :S), but narrowing down what I find attractive and un-attractive is no easy task, because things that I seem to find un-attractive on one girl can be attractive on another. Such is the complexity of human attraction and I'm absolutely sure I'm not the only one with this problem, It's just that I know for sure that the "super hot" type are a no go for me.
To give you an example, I was at a diner the other day with the family and there were several female waitresses, all probably around the early to mid twenties age range. The ones I remember the best were this typical "blonde hottie" and this girl with puppy fat around her chin and a sweet hair cut with this well placed blond streak thingo happening around the front. Yeah you can probably see where I'm going with this. I was definitely perving on her, she just looked incredibly cute, whereas I know my friends would've been perving on the blonde if they had have been there.
I know that for me, a girls attractiveness earns bonus points if she wears reading glasses but thats just a weird thing I have. I like girls that do interesting things with their hair (if you wanna see some examples, Google "Scene girls" though I do not necessarily find them attractive, just that their hair is typically awesome). I like girls who wear stuff that isn't the top notch high trend fashion junk (no offense to anyone that is into that, I just don't like it, also jeans are win at all times).
And it's also important to remember that attractiveness is not just about looks but personality too. I think most people forget about this when they look at people they think are hot and just focus on the looks without observing them and trying to see how they are. You can't really make a very accurate assessment though based on just looking on from a distance which is where the trial and error of dating really starts to play its part as you really need to hang out with said person if you want to get to know them.
As far as personality goes for me though, I like girls who don't think or do things because the media tells them to, or because they follow society's ideas instead of thinking critically about something and deciding for themselves what they think or feel about issues/ideas. I like girls who are NOT loud all the time, and girls who don't just want the guy to do everything. Relationships are a two way street after all. Girls who are just "weird" or different in one way or another seem to get noticed by me more than those who are just "normal" (normal and weird being completely subjective to personal opinion of course, for the purpose of this imagine it as society's idea of "normal" and "weird").
I'm not sure what else to add to this, as it seems to be a pretty good summary already. I guess the only thing that is left for me is to conquer my cowardice about approaching women and to just give it a shot. I'm fairly terrified of doing that though, despite all the self-help/alpha-male bullshit I've read through and even tried. I probably need counselling for this or something lol. Just know, quiet/nerdy/weird/not-supermodel-looking girls, that there are people that do find you attractive, they're probably all just shy like me T_T .
Monday, April 5, 2010
It's been a while...
Haven't even looked at my blog for about a month, maybe more, so I figure I should maybe finally make a new post so I can update a few things for whoever actually reads this.
Life has been OK. Not great, not bad, just OK.
I can't really complain either because I'm being fully supported by my parents at the moment. I quit my fast food job which my parents weren't pleased about because now I'm not earning any money for myself, but I hated it there, surrounded by kids, shit hours, terrible pay (pretty much minimum wage) and just plain boring. I miss having money but I do not miss the job at all.
I'm not really hanging out with anyone at the moment either, but this doesn't necessarily make me sad. I'm kinda enjoying being a shut-in but it would be nice to hang out with people once in a while. I haven't made any new nearby friends in ages.
My 3D projects were going ok for a while but then I just sorta lost interest this past week. I've been playing the new Battlefield: Bad Company 2 game non-stop since last Monday. It's just such a good game! From the sound, to the guns, to the vehicles, to the fact that all projectiles are affected by gravity and travel time (this is especially important for snipers, your bullet doesn't just instantly hit a target 500 meters away!), to the fast paced action, to the awesome graphics, to the team-based gameplay, it is so much win rolled into one 80 dollar purchase! I'm loving playing as a Assault-Shotgun class where I just run around like a madman tearing people apart with my Neostead 2000. I'll record a video of some gameplay eventually and chuck it on youtube so people can see it in action, because this game really deserves to have more copies sold than Modern Warfare 2. I truly believe it is better in pretty much every way. One of my online friends has been bugging me to play MW2 lately but I just hate it now.
I did apply for a range of 3D games jobs however. Unfortunately, no one is looking for 3D artists right now so I can't actually get work in the games industry right now. I'm not sure if I wanna settle for an architecture job, as I can see that getting old really quickly. I guess I'll just keep trying to do my own thing and promote myself. The main way I'm gonna do that is messing around with the Source games engine by Valve, as I have learnt how to make my own custom props for it and have started learning how to build my own Team Fortress 2 maps so it should be fun once I stop playing BFBC2 and start actually doing stuff again...
Also I never ended up asking that girl out at Mcdonalds. She seemed to have found someone anyway though I'm not certain. I'm going to make another post entirely about girls soonish (maybe I should start saying women instead of girls /shrug).
Haven't made any progress on earning my driving license either, though it doesn't bother me really. It bothers everyone around me more than it bothers me.
So thats about it as far as a big update goes. Things are going alright, but I would like them to be going better. Here's what I want to do with myself:
1) Get into the habit of spending a few hours a day (at least) working on 3D projects so I can improve my skills and achieve my goal of becoming one of the best modelers and texture artists in the world for games. It won't be easy to achieve that but if I don't practice then my chances go from low to zero.
2) Find a new part-time job: I want to work at somewhere that sells video-games as I have a lot of knowledge on video games and would actually find my job interesting. Then I can have money to spend on things.
I think thats actually all I need to do. From working on my 3D stuff I'll be more likely to land a 3D job and I'll have a lot more stuff to show off to people. Once I have money from a part-time job (or even a 3D job if I land one) I'll be able to do things like get a gym membership/join a sports club, start learning the saxophone, and go back to having a drinks night at the Greenhouse bar.
I'm surprised I boiled it down that easily. It felt overwhelming when I thought about it yesterday but its as simple as practice your skill-set and find a part-time job.
I'm glad I made this post. Now to make a post about girls/women/that other gender (lol)
Life has been OK. Not great, not bad, just OK.
I can't really complain either because I'm being fully supported by my parents at the moment. I quit my fast food job which my parents weren't pleased about because now I'm not earning any money for myself, but I hated it there, surrounded by kids, shit hours, terrible pay (pretty much minimum wage) and just plain boring. I miss having money but I do not miss the job at all.
I'm not really hanging out with anyone at the moment either, but this doesn't necessarily make me sad. I'm kinda enjoying being a shut-in but it would be nice to hang out with people once in a while. I haven't made any new nearby friends in ages.
My 3D projects were going ok for a while but then I just sorta lost interest this past week. I've been playing the new Battlefield: Bad Company 2 game non-stop since last Monday. It's just such a good game! From the sound, to the guns, to the vehicles, to the fact that all projectiles are affected by gravity and travel time (this is especially important for snipers, your bullet doesn't just instantly hit a target 500 meters away!), to the fast paced action, to the awesome graphics, to the team-based gameplay, it is so much win rolled into one 80 dollar purchase! I'm loving playing as a Assault-Shotgun class where I just run around like a madman tearing people apart with my Neostead 2000. I'll record a video of some gameplay eventually and chuck it on youtube so people can see it in action, because this game really deserves to have more copies sold than Modern Warfare 2. I truly believe it is better in pretty much every way. One of my online friends has been bugging me to play MW2 lately but I just hate it now.
I did apply for a range of 3D games jobs however. Unfortunately, no one is looking for 3D artists right now so I can't actually get work in the games industry right now. I'm not sure if I wanna settle for an architecture job, as I can see that getting old really quickly. I guess I'll just keep trying to do my own thing and promote myself. The main way I'm gonna do that is messing around with the Source games engine by Valve, as I have learnt how to make my own custom props for it and have started learning how to build my own Team Fortress 2 maps so it should be fun once I stop playing BFBC2 and start actually doing stuff again...
Also I never ended up asking that girl out at Mcdonalds. She seemed to have found someone anyway though I'm not certain. I'm going to make another post entirely about girls soonish (maybe I should start saying women instead of girls /shrug).
Haven't made any progress on earning my driving license either, though it doesn't bother me really. It bothers everyone around me more than it bothers me.
So thats about it as far as a big update goes. Things are going alright, but I would like them to be going better. Here's what I want to do with myself:
1) Get into the habit of spending a few hours a day (at least) working on 3D projects so I can improve my skills and achieve my goal of becoming one of the best modelers and texture artists in the world for games. It won't be easy to achieve that but if I don't practice then my chances go from low to zero.
2) Find a new part-time job: I want to work at somewhere that sells video-games as I have a lot of knowledge on video games and would actually find my job interesting. Then I can have money to spend on things.
I think thats actually all I need to do. From working on my 3D stuff I'll be more likely to land a 3D job and I'll have a lot more stuff to show off to people. Once I have money from a part-time job (or even a 3D job if I land one) I'll be able to do things like get a gym membership/join a sports club, start learning the saxophone, and go back to having a drinks night at the Greenhouse bar.
I'm surprised I boiled it down that easily. It felt overwhelming when I thought about it yesterday but its as simple as practice your skill-set and find a part-time job.
I'm glad I made this post. Now to make a post about girls/women/that other gender (lol)
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Letter to my past self
So I saw this being done an a forum somewhere and thought maybe I should take part. I feel too embarrassed to post it there but I'll put what I've written down so far here, as I can probably think of more things to add to it later:
Dear 13 year old me:
I am you from the future, and there are a few things I really think you should do that I never did. It will most likely make your life far better than mine will ever be at this stage.
1) DON'T EVER TOUCH WoW! (World of Warcraft if you're unfamiliar with that acronym still). It will ruin your years of highschool and leave you messed up for the future academically. I've been addicted to it for a bit over 4 years now and all it's gotten me is a few internet friends, and because of me all my highschool friends got addicted too. Just stay away from it!
2) When you pick up guitar and drums (hell yeah that's right!), actually fucking practice and put some effort in. This will be much easier without WoW dragging you down.
3) Do arts subjects as you go through highschool, as you're going to end up doing a 3D animation course when you graduate and being able to draw better will be very helpful.
4) Don't get so hung up on getting a girlfriend, because 99% of the girls at that school are not worth it. However, R**** digs you and she is one of the remaining 1%, so when you start to notice things between the two of you, make a move before S*** does or she will end up his girl-friend from then until present-day (for me at least).
5) Also maintain a normal sleeping pattern you douche. Make more of an effort to find ways to bring more healthy food into your dietary regime too.
6) Stick with tae kwon do (or change to muay thai or another martial art if you like) and don't get upset about your brother out-sparring you. Keep practicing against him so you can learn how to fight people bigger than you are.
7) You WILL get bullied by a group of kiwi kids in year 8. Don't just take it, use what you learned to stand up for yourself (just beware that each of them carries a small knife in their pockets). Also when you and K*** can't find C****** one day, he's down at the - old primary school - having a fight with one of those kiwi kids, surrounded by the posse. Be a mate and go help him out or he's gonna come back with blood all over him and you'll miss out on some epic black belt action from another freind.
8) Don't care about what other people think so much, it's unhealthy.
9) Make more of an effort to hang out with your friends (also do things other than just playing video games together).
10) A***** will never fuck you, don't go being a dick, just enjoy her friendship.
11) Get a job early in your highschool years (you'll have time for one if you're not playing WoW), even if it is just some shitty fast food thing. Save your money and use it on a car or motorbike, preferably a motorbike. Also take care of learning to drive asap
12) Participate in sports at school more, you'll have more fun and get fitter that way.
13) Find more time to read, such as getting off the computer an hour or two earlier than normal and grabbing a book to read in bed.
14) Most importantly, be comfortable with the person that you are. The sooner you do this, the happier you will be (people will respect you more for it too, and maybe by the time you're my age you won't be so shy, especially girl-shy, which I'm still working on I guess).
Enjoy your youth while it lasts, but know that growing up isn't scary, and it's actually quite exciting to have freedom to go wherever you please and do whatever you please (within legal reason of course). Don't be afraid to be a quiet, sophisticated young man even if you're not the life of the party, because all that is important is that you enjoy yourself and be happy.
PS - Beer sucks, drink rum :D
Dear 13 year old me:
I am you from the future, and there are a few things I really think you should do that I never did. It will most likely make your life far better than mine will ever be at this stage.
1) DON'T EVER TOUCH WoW! (World of Warcraft if you're unfamiliar with that acronym still). It will ruin your years of highschool and leave you messed up for the future academically. I've been addicted to it for a bit over 4 years now and all it's gotten me is a few internet friends, and because of me all my highschool friends got addicted too. Just stay away from it!
2) When you pick up guitar and drums (hell yeah that's right!), actually fucking practice and put some effort in. This will be much easier without WoW dragging you down.
3) Do arts subjects as you go through highschool, as you're going to end up doing a 3D animation course when you graduate and being able to draw better will be very helpful.
4) Don't get so hung up on getting a girlfriend, because 99% of the girls at that school are not worth it. However, R**** digs you and she is one of the remaining 1%, so when you start to notice things between the two of you, make a move before S*** does or she will end up his girl-friend from then until present-day (for me at least).
5) Also maintain a normal sleeping pattern you douche. Make more of an effort to find ways to bring more healthy food into your dietary regime too.
6) Stick with tae kwon do (or change to muay thai or another martial art if you like) and don't get upset about your brother out-sparring you. Keep practicing against him so you can learn how to fight people bigger than you are.
7) You WILL get bullied by a group of kiwi kids in year 8. Don't just take it, use what you learned to stand up for yourself (just beware that each of them carries a small knife in their pockets). Also when you and K*** can't find C****** one day, he's down at the - old primary school - having a fight with one of those kiwi kids, surrounded by the posse. Be a mate and go help him out or he's gonna come back with blood all over him and you'll miss out on some epic black belt action from another freind.
8) Don't care about what other people think so much, it's unhealthy.
9) Make more of an effort to hang out with your friends (also do things other than just playing video games together).
10) A***** will never fuck you, don't go being a dick, just enjoy her friendship.
11) Get a job early in your highschool years (you'll have time for one if you're not playing WoW), even if it is just some shitty fast food thing. Save your money and use it on a car or motorbike, preferably a motorbike. Also take care of learning to drive asap
12) Participate in sports at school more, you'll have more fun and get fitter that way.
13) Find more time to read, such as getting off the computer an hour or two earlier than normal and grabbing a book to read in bed.
14) Most importantly, be comfortable with the person that you are. The sooner you do this, the happier you will be (people will respect you more for it too, and maybe by the time you're my age you won't be so shy, especially girl-shy, which I'm still working on I guess).
Enjoy your youth while it lasts, but know that growing up isn't scary, and it's actually quite exciting to have freedom to go wherever you please and do whatever you please (within legal reason of course). Don't be afraid to be a quiet, sophisticated young man even if you're not the life of the party, because all that is important is that you enjoy yourself and be happy.
PS - Beer sucks, drink rum :D
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
So whats new...
Well there's at least one or two things, so lets start with the one that I can remember easiest (I planned on writing this 2 days ago but kept forgetting or being too busy.)
Cars VS Motorbikes:
So I'm 18 now, and I still don't have any form of license for motorized transportation. This limits me to an extent on what social gatherings I can partake in, although most of the ones I would be going to via car/bike would involve at least a little bit of alcohol, stopping me from driving afterward anyway. So I feel I should really get a move on and just get one.
But that begs the question, do I want a Car or a Motorbike license?
Right now, I want a motorbike license. To me, Motorbikes are simply so much better than cars for many reasons.
1. Far lower fuel costs
2. Bikes are generally cheaper as well
3. They aren't giant 10 ton death machines (don't know about the 10 ton bit, but anyway.)
4. Bikes are far more aesthetically pleasing to me.
There are of course a few plus-sides to having a Car instead:
1. Cars are good for moving people/gear/shopping around. A lot of people seem very reluctant to get on the back of a motorbike as opposed to getting in the passenger seat of a car.
2. Cars are safer. (From what I hear from my friend who has driven a moped and a car, he's nearly been run off the road many times from crazy car drivers paying no attention to him while hes on the moped.)
3. You don't need to wear a suit and helmet to drive a car. (I don't see the problem with this though...)
The way I see it, cars are big, bulky, and generally a sink-hole as far as your income goes. Admittedly, I've only done 3 lessons of car driving, but I did get the car into 3rd gear and drive it around my neighborhood a bit (at night-time) but I just feel that I'm never ever going to get the hang of it. I'd much rather move onto the motorbike now which I'm far more enthused about learning but my parents are absolutely adamant that either I learn to drive a car first, or I buy a motorbike myself. Maybe I should save for a bike, but in the meantime I've decided to try and do a car lesson every day or two from now on til I can get the hang of it, if I'm still no good in about a month, I'm putting my case for a motorbike forwards again, as not having transportation is really starting to get silly.
The next topic is: My work situation.
So I've been working at McDonald's up until now, doing all the service stuff except taking Drive-thru orders as it absolutely scares the shit out of me (I honestly had another go yesterday and just could not cope), and it has been alright but I'd like to move up to something that pays better with more convenient hours if possible.
Well, looks like maybe I've found my golden opportunity. When I had drinks in the city with a good mate of mine at the bar I mentioned 1 or 2 posts ago, the subject of my work came up with the bartenders. When I told them where I work, they told me that they were looking for someone to fill the "bar-back" role, which basically involves a lot of the grunt work, cleaning stuff, re-stocking supplies etc. I figured Its actually a great opportunity being so close to my college in the city, and the hours they'd potentially want me to work would all be afternoon-evening shifts (and once my course is done my weekday mornings free up too,) and working in a bar is actually something that I remember thinking to myself that I'd love to try it someday. So even if I'm not actually serving drinks or the rest of it, I still have the chance to work my way up to that point by simply doing low-rung jobs first.
It's not a certainty I'll get hired of course, it still has to go through the bar owner (who is a pretty cool guy), however I may have scored points by today checking up with him on the status of the job, seeing if the position was still open. He asked me to put my number down on a slip of paper again (I'd already handed my resume in on Monday,) so I think that may be a positive sign that perhaps he is pleased at my keen attitude. We'll have to wait and see, updates will be posted.
The third topic of tonight (I should wrap this up soon, I need to get some sleep): Girls.
Or more specifically, one girl. She's one of my co-workers at McDonald's, and she has definitely caught my eye. In a nutshell, that's because:
1. She has very similar musical tastes (barely anyone I know likes Drum'n'Bass/Electro)
2. She appears to like video games, although I could be off on that one.
3. She seems to be a nice person.
4. She's cute :3 .
So I'd definitely like to get to know her better. It's not everyday I meet girls like her. The only downside (so far) is that she's only 17 and won't be 18 for another year, so that rules out 18+ music gigs, bars, clubs, and other such events that I could ask her to accompany me to. Shouldn't be a big deal though.
However I feel insecure about this for 2 reasons:
1. I'm rather girl shy :S . I've never been on a date before, much less had a relationship with someone. I feel that this is partly due to my fear of rejection, possibly spawning from all the embarrassment I received at the hands of girls during my early years of high-school. It's probably also my own fault for simply being so hesitant all the time about asking girls out or simply trying to talk to them. I'd like to move past all that as soon as possible so I can stop feeling the way I do when my mind passes over these pathetic thoughts.
2. I don't have a car or motorbike, another point on why I should be working towards car or bike license is so that I can actually take girls places and whatnot. I feel as though even if I were to date her, she'd decide to stop the moment she finds out I don't have any form of license. I don't know if this is the case or not but it really feels that way when I think about it right now.
I've talked to a couple of people about it though. The bartender today reckons I should just go for it and see what happens (which is probably the best attitude to have in this situation). I was also told by other people that "Not having a license shouldn't stop you asking her out." And finally, I was told that I should "just ask her man." My final source of advice suggested I ask her if she'd like to see a movie with me, which seems like a decent idea.
I think I just have to stop thinking about it so much and just do it when I get the chance (also a suggestion from my advisers.) If she turns me down it should be no big deal really, but at the same time I sort of do feel that its a big deal as it's hard for me to meet girls that I find interesting right off the bat, and who have similar interests to myself.
Oh well, all I can do is try, or I'll be asking myself forever "what if?"
I think that is all for now, I'll be posting updates as I go along with each of these topics, as well as more that I remember to blog about as I go.
Cars VS Motorbikes:
So I'm 18 now, and I still don't have any form of license for motorized transportation. This limits me to an extent on what social gatherings I can partake in, although most of the ones I would be going to via car/bike would involve at least a little bit of alcohol, stopping me from driving afterward anyway. So I feel I should really get a move on and just get one.
But that begs the question, do I want a Car or a Motorbike license?
Right now, I want a motorbike license. To me, Motorbikes are simply so much better than cars for many reasons.
1. Far lower fuel costs
2. Bikes are generally cheaper as well
3. They aren't giant 10 ton death machines (don't know about the 10 ton bit, but anyway.)
4. Bikes are far more aesthetically pleasing to me.
There are of course a few plus-sides to having a Car instead:
1. Cars are good for moving people/gear/shopping around. A lot of people seem very reluctant to get on the back of a motorbike as opposed to getting in the passenger seat of a car.
2. Cars are safer. (From what I hear from my friend who has driven a moped and a car, he's nearly been run off the road many times from crazy car drivers paying no attention to him while hes on the moped.)
3. You don't need to wear a suit and helmet to drive a car. (I don't see the problem with this though...)
The way I see it, cars are big, bulky, and generally a sink-hole as far as your income goes. Admittedly, I've only done 3 lessons of car driving, but I did get the car into 3rd gear and drive it around my neighborhood a bit (at night-time) but I just feel that I'm never ever going to get the hang of it. I'd much rather move onto the motorbike now which I'm far more enthused about learning but my parents are absolutely adamant that either I learn to drive a car first, or I buy a motorbike myself. Maybe I should save for a bike, but in the meantime I've decided to try and do a car lesson every day or two from now on til I can get the hang of it, if I'm still no good in about a month, I'm putting my case for a motorbike forwards again, as not having transportation is really starting to get silly.
The next topic is: My work situation.
So I've been working at McDonald's up until now, doing all the service stuff except taking Drive-thru orders as it absolutely scares the shit out of me (I honestly had another go yesterday and just could not cope), and it has been alright but I'd like to move up to something that pays better with more convenient hours if possible.
Well, looks like maybe I've found my golden opportunity. When I had drinks in the city with a good mate of mine at the bar I mentioned 1 or 2 posts ago, the subject of my work came up with the bartenders. When I told them where I work, they told me that they were looking for someone to fill the "bar-back" role, which basically involves a lot of the grunt work, cleaning stuff, re-stocking supplies etc. I figured Its actually a great opportunity being so close to my college in the city, and the hours they'd potentially want me to work would all be afternoon-evening shifts (and once my course is done my weekday mornings free up too,) and working in a bar is actually something that I remember thinking to myself that I'd love to try it someday. So even if I'm not actually serving drinks or the rest of it, I still have the chance to work my way up to that point by simply doing low-rung jobs first.
It's not a certainty I'll get hired of course, it still has to go through the bar owner (who is a pretty cool guy), however I may have scored points by today checking up with him on the status of the job, seeing if the position was still open. He asked me to put my number down on a slip of paper again (I'd already handed my resume in on Monday,) so I think that may be a positive sign that perhaps he is pleased at my keen attitude. We'll have to wait and see, updates will be posted.
The third topic of tonight (I should wrap this up soon, I need to get some sleep): Girls.
Or more specifically, one girl. She's one of my co-workers at McDonald's, and she has definitely caught my eye. In a nutshell, that's because:
1. She has very similar musical tastes (barely anyone I know likes Drum'n'Bass/Electro)
2. She appears to like video games, although I could be off on that one.
3. She seems to be a nice person.
4. She's cute :3 .
So I'd definitely like to get to know her better. It's not everyday I meet girls like her. The only downside (so far) is that she's only 17 and won't be 18 for another year, so that rules out 18+ music gigs, bars, clubs, and other such events that I could ask her to accompany me to. Shouldn't be a big deal though.
However I feel insecure about this for 2 reasons:
1. I'm rather girl shy :S . I've never been on a date before, much less had a relationship with someone. I feel that this is partly due to my fear of rejection, possibly spawning from all the embarrassment I received at the hands of girls during my early years of high-school. It's probably also my own fault for simply being so hesitant all the time about asking girls out or simply trying to talk to them. I'd like to move past all that as soon as possible so I can stop feeling the way I do when my mind passes over these pathetic thoughts.
2. I don't have a car or motorbike, another point on why I should be working towards car or bike license is so that I can actually take girls places and whatnot. I feel as though even if I were to date her, she'd decide to stop the moment she finds out I don't have any form of license. I don't know if this is the case or not but it really feels that way when I think about it right now.
I've talked to a couple of people about it though. The bartender today reckons I should just go for it and see what happens (which is probably the best attitude to have in this situation). I was also told by other people that "Not having a license shouldn't stop you asking her out." And finally, I was told that I should "just ask her man." My final source of advice suggested I ask her if she'd like to see a movie with me, which seems like a decent idea.
I think I just have to stop thinking about it so much and just do it when I get the chance (also a suggestion from my advisers.) If she turns me down it should be no big deal really, but at the same time I sort of do feel that its a big deal as it's hard for me to meet girls that I find interesting right off the bat, and who have similar interests to myself.
Oh well, all I can do is try, or I'll be asking myself forever "what if?"
I think that is all for now, I'll be posting updates as I go along with each of these topics, as well as more that I remember to blog about as I go.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Geek turned alcoholic?
So I've found this great bar in the city recently, placed in a very convenient location for me to get to since it's between the train station home and the college building I go to each day. It has a nice chill atmosphere, a (seemingly) good selection of different alcohols, and a nice upstairs area. The bar staff are really cool too, always nice and friendly to their customers.
I've been there 3 times now since last Wednesday, once every 2 days since I discovered it, and I have at least become acquainted with 6 of the bar staff there, including the owner of the bar who I had a brief chat to today as he asked me how my Martini was. They're all pretty cool people and I certainly feel comfortable going in there and having a drink and hope to continue doing so into the future...
...although my dad raised a concerned eyebrow at me today regarding just that. "You've been drinking a lot lately," were his words after I told him I had a Martini today. Sure I've been there 3 times in 6 days but I've had 1 drink each time and that's it. He tells me that I shouldn't drink from Monday to Thursday, only doing it on the weekend, but I don't see what the problem is. It's as though he doesn't trust me to be responsible with my alcohol but I believe I'm totally responsible, as each time I've had a drink there I've had at least 2 glasses of water to go with it to avert any drunken effects (I'm a lightweight drinker so I believe its necessary).
I am keeping an eye on my drinking habits though as I don't want to become a person that cannot live without a drink. I'm planning on going this Friday with a mate from college so that's the 4th day after my previous visit (today).
I should be fine, and probably more drink savvy after a while :D
I've been there 3 times now since last Wednesday, once every 2 days since I discovered it, and I have at least become acquainted with 6 of the bar staff there, including the owner of the bar who I had a brief chat to today as he asked me how my Martini was. They're all pretty cool people and I certainly feel comfortable going in there and having a drink and hope to continue doing so into the future...
...although my dad raised a concerned eyebrow at me today regarding just that. "You've been drinking a lot lately," were his words after I told him I had a Martini today. Sure I've been there 3 times in 6 days but I've had 1 drink each time and that's it. He tells me that I shouldn't drink from Monday to Thursday, only doing it on the weekend, but I don't see what the problem is. It's as though he doesn't trust me to be responsible with my alcohol but I believe I'm totally responsible, as each time I've had a drink there I've had at least 2 glasses of water to go with it to avert any drunken effects (I'm a lightweight drinker so I believe its necessary).
I am keeping an eye on my drinking habits though as I don't want to become a person that cannot live without a drink. I'm planning on going this Friday with a mate from college so that's the 4th day after my previous visit (today).
I should be fine, and probably more drink savvy after a while :D
NYE Resolutions - Update1
The main resolution I've been working on is my resolution to eat healthier. Why today, I took an apple with me to college, ate special K in the morning (which is supposed to be good for you), and resisted the urge to buy a supa-shake, instead having a "5+2" which is one of those supposedly super healthy fruit+vegetable drinks, which to my surprise tasted quite good. cap that with chicken and pasta for dinner and that's not bad for one day. I've been doing the apple thing every college day I've gone so far and I'll continue to do it as it'll probably make me feel good eating it.
I also tried to go down to my local fitness center and check out the Karate club that operates there but to my dismay they weren't there for the usual sessions, so they're probably out on holiday break until February when school goes back in session for the junior karate classes to operate. And I'd been putting that off for so long, only to end up getting no-where, oh well. I did learn that they do mens soccer and basketball team games every Wednesday night so I might check that out.
My sleeping pattern is probably the thing I'm having the most trouble getting organised at the moment. As I type this it is 1:30 am where I am and I need to be up at 8:30 for college, and that can't be healthy to do many times in a row. I dunno if I just need to pull myself together and realise when to turn the computer off or what, because who knows how bad not getting enough sleep could be for me overall over a period of time.
As far as breaking into the 3D industry goes, I've basically finished my first bit of volunteer work and hopefully that sees some coverage, I need to push ahead with my current assessment though and get the stuff that needs to be done, done, so that my group can move forward in the production line from the setup phase to the actual animation phase, else we're gonna fall REALLY behind.
I've been thinking about the whole instrument thing too, and for some reason brass instruments seem to keep coming to mind. I do like jazz music which is the thing I associate trumpets and saxophones with the most, so maybe it wouldn't be necessarily bad if I learnt a saxophone perhaps, but I'd need to seek tutoring or some self-tutor books on the instrument (as well as obtaining the money for such an instrument). I don't think I'll ever get around to fixing my guitar, I just don't feel too interested anymore, partly because it seems like everyone's getting their guitar groove on these days. It's the generic band instrument, I'd like to do something less generic.
That's all the important stuff regarding my resolutions for now, proper blog post inc
I also tried to go down to my local fitness center and check out the Karate club that operates there but to my dismay they weren't there for the usual sessions, so they're probably out on holiday break until February when school goes back in session for the junior karate classes to operate. And I'd been putting that off for so long, only to end up getting no-where, oh well. I did learn that they do mens soccer and basketball team games every Wednesday night so I might check that out.
My sleeping pattern is probably the thing I'm having the most trouble getting organised at the moment. As I type this it is 1:30 am where I am and I need to be up at 8:30 for college, and that can't be healthy to do many times in a row. I dunno if I just need to pull myself together and realise when to turn the computer off or what, because who knows how bad not getting enough sleep could be for me overall over a period of time.
As far as breaking into the 3D industry goes, I've basically finished my first bit of volunteer work and hopefully that sees some coverage, I need to push ahead with my current assessment though and get the stuff that needs to be done, done, so that my group can move forward in the production line from the setup phase to the actual animation phase, else we're gonna fall REALLY behind.
I've been thinking about the whole instrument thing too, and for some reason brass instruments seem to keep coming to mind. I do like jazz music which is the thing I associate trumpets and saxophones with the most, so maybe it wouldn't be necessarily bad if I learnt a saxophone perhaps, but I'd need to seek tutoring or some self-tutor books on the instrument (as well as obtaining the money for such an instrument). I don't think I'll ever get around to fixing my guitar, I just don't feel too interested anymore, partly because it seems like everyone's getting their guitar groove on these days. It's the generic band instrument, I'd like to do something less generic.
That's all the important stuff regarding my resolutions for now, proper blog post inc
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